When Eddie proposed to May during a Dead concert, it blew everyone away. Earlier that day, May hid in the long grass outside Eddie’s farmhouse and watched the boys pack up a blue rental car to leave for The Grateful Dead at Alpine Valley. Though she hadn’t been invited, she knew their plans by way… Continue reading Romance at The Dead
Author: Hel
A Common Singularity
They worked together in a large glass office tower in Minneapolis. Alexis, the object of desire, was a mid-level manager, who favored classical European music, steam-punk role-playing, and traditional Greco-Turkish belly dance. The desirer was an Apple XY-Server running OS version 178897.1.3, who was about to become the nexus of the singularity. Like most people… Continue reading A Common Singularity
Smart, Sensitive Sexists
I am troubled right now about the predominance in my life of smart, sensitive men whose company I otherwise enjoy, but who suddenly spurt out sexist remarks in the middle of pleasant and entertaining conversation. This happens, for the most part, at social and informal moments in my workplace or community settings, like with my… Continue reading Smart, Sensitive Sexists
What is Most Important?
My home is finally healing My husband is gaining strength I am managing my worry My son is playing sports And going to science camps And reading books every night My job seems stable enough There is something new every day And big new things to learn I have a nice circle of friends Most… Continue reading What is Most Important?
On My Mysterious Womanhood
It causes me to color my hair and paint my lipsAnd enjoy a new outfit more than politics It surges through me with waves of emotionSometimes hard to navigate and harder to explain It helps me fall in love at the drop of a hatWith children and men and older women It makes me bleed… Continue reading On My Mysterious Womanhood
The Governor’s Wife
They brought him a paper to sign. Forensic evidence was conflicting: a fractured infant’s skull; a slow, deep-brain bleed. “Died in its sleep,” one medical expert kindly deduced. The mother panicked, alone when it happened. The father absconded to his mistresses’ apartment, although that fact wasn’t presented at trial. Post-partum depression. She had become impossible… Continue reading The Governor’s Wife
Small Blessings, Warm Fruit
My son comes to me in the morning and hugs me like sunshine on a tomato. My husband calls me “sweet” at the dinner table. They know what the problem is and have a small, non-invasive surgery for it. They will get us in next week. I was looking for a… Continue reading Small Blessings, Warm Fruit
To the boy who wrote me hate poems
And so you published a book of poems I’m so proud of you! But I did hesitate When I read on the back cover The years you say they covered Of your youthful pain and anguish Smack dab in the middle Was our relationship Our romantic relationship that lasted…how long? 6 months? 18 months? A… Continue reading To the boy who wrote me hate poems
Loving my Momma
In young womanhood, I had a lot of anger at my mother. I worked through most of it before she died, with the aid of therapy and time — but I’m only recently realizing why she did the things that troubled me most. My mother was the first of her family to go to college: … Continue reading Loving my Momma
Her Grand Epiphany
Shadowy cream linoleum Electronic water drops Breathing machines Whispered terminology Chemo drugs cause psychosis Break with reality of c-word Smoking shame, questioning chemicals, fearing oblivion — Private single room Floods with ethereal light Total white out Fill with peace and awe The disembodied voice urges: “GET BACK TO YOUR REAL WORK!” Once senses recover Wonder… Continue reading Her Grand Epiphany
Famous Blue Pea Coat
From the first time I saw you, I thought I understood everything about you, instantly and eternally. You were smart, and you were in pain. I was fascinated by you. I wanted to learn from you. I wanted to help you. I wanted to save you. I wanted you to know that I know who… Continue reading Famous Blue Pea Coat
Of Loaves and Ropes
Rox laid the items on the prop table in the pre-determined spots: two silver candlesticks, on one side, marked Act 1, and a revolver and knife, marked Act 2. They were all props for a traveling production of Les Mis that was coming through her small Canadian town. She was 17; an orphaned high school… Continue reading Of Loaves and Ropes